Ted Cruz To Announce Carly Fiorina As VP Pick

Despite being mathematically eliminated from winning the GOP presidential nomination outright, Ted Cruz will reportedly announce at a rally in Indiana today that Carly Fiorina, his former rival for the GOP nomination, will be his vice presidential running mate if he is able to pull out a victory at this summer's convention.

Fiorina launched her political career after the board of Hewlett-Packard fired her as CEO after she “almost destroy[ed] the company” in a tenure that included mass layoffs, outsourcing jobs, illicit trade with Iran and a golden parachute for herself.

While she didn’t succeed in her 2010 bid for a U.S. Senate seat in California, she won national notoriety for her bizarre remarks about climate change, hostility to gay marriage and the baffling “demon sheep” ad she ran against her primary opponent.

After losing her job as CEO and losing her Senate race, Fiorina spent time on the conservative speaking circuit and then launched a presidential bid, positioning herself as a conservative female alternative to Hillary Clinton while at the same time decrying Clinton for using gender identity politics.

She emerged as an outspoken opponent of abortion rights, using her platform to fib about abortion statistics and denounce a nonexistent Planned Parenthood video, which apparently no one besides Fiorina has ever seen. In one bizarre incident, Fiorina’s campaign reportedly “ambushed” a group of children visiting a botanical garden to use them in a photo-op for an anti-abortion speech.

The multimillionaire former CEO also raised eyebrows when she told Glenn Beck that “only the wealthy, the powerful, the big and the well-connected” have prospered while “all the rest of us are getting crushed,” and used bogus statistics about women in the workplace to deflect from her opposition to equal pay legislation.

Towards the end of her foundering campaign, Fiorina resorted to criticizing Hillary Clinton astoo ambitious to be president and attacking her marriage. She also went after Cruz for his role in the government shutdown and “saying whatever he needs to say to get elected.”

With this record of insults and false attacks, Fiorina is a great match for Cruz.

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Alex Jones: 'Psychopath' Beyoncé Out To 'Ruin Lives' And Destroy America

Alex Jones is continuing his attacks on Beyoncé, who he believes is a brain-eating CIA plant bent on fomenting violence.

The InfoWars broadcaster said on Monday that “when you see Beyoncé running around saying she hates men, blowing things up, beating up cars, smashing out windows with horrible, ugly looks on her face, teaching young people to be filled with rage,” know that she has been paid by the government to “act like a psychopath” and “look like she’s on steroids” so “that you run out and burn things and hit people and attack people and get shot.”

“This is cultural death,” he said.

Jones added that LGBT-friendly television programs are also part of a CIA plot to destroy families and society at large, which would then justify the growth of Big Government.

The right-wing conspiracy theorist went on to say that Beyoncé and Kesha are “devil-worshiping” stars who love “attacking the police and attacking men and baseball-batting and blowing stuff up,” calling Beyoncé a “swollen, spoiled-brat woman.”

He even lamented that his daughter “comes home singing Beyoncé songs” despite his protestations, warning that the singer's music is “designed to absolutely ruin [children's] lives on purpose.”

Yesterday, Jones released a compilation video of his ally Donald Trump’s praise for InfoWars.

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Alex Jones

Bryan Fischer: Target's Policy Will Transform The Store Into A Motel For Rebellious Teenagers

After spending several segments on his radio broadcast yesterday ranting about Target's policy of allowing transgender customers and employees to use the restrooms and fitting rooms that match their gender identities, Bryan Fischer took a call from a listener who had a rather novel concern about the policy.

"Rebecca from Van Buren, Arkansas" told Fischer that she was concerned that a "rebellious teenager" might use the bathrooms or changing rooms at Target to hook up with their boyfriend or girlfriend, essentially transforming the store into a motel.

Fischer thought that she made an excellent point.

"You know, Rebecca's got a great point," he said. "I hadn't even thought about that but it's just another alarming permutation of this deal. If you've got a daughter and you don't care for her boyfriend, you don't want them hooking up, you don't want them meeting, you know his intentions for her are not good, what is to stop her from arraigning a tryst in a fitting room at Target? He can go into any room he wants, she can go in there, they can have a certain amount of privacy; or in a Target bathroom, go in there and lock the door and have a certain amount of privacy. So again, you start seeing the permutation, all the different angles this thing can take, none of which are good, none of which are healthy, none of which are good for the family, none of which are good for sexual integrity and all that kind of thing and, you know, we've just sort of scratched the surface of the number of ways these policies can be twisted and perverted for purposes which are not good for anybody."

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Right Wing Round-Up - 4/26/16

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Right Wing Bonus Tracks - 4/26/16

  • According to Andy Schlafly, the chaos at the Eagle Forum is being fomented by a bunch of "liberals" within the organization who are "fine with the feminism of Ted Cruz and his wife." 
  • Janet Porter joins the Religious Right crusade against Target: "Remember when Cracker Barrel threatened to pull Duck Dynasty products because of Phil Robertson’s pro-marriage stand? We responded, and they backed down. Now it’s Target’s turn."
  • Burt Prelutsky declares that "there isn’t a doubt in my mind that leftists are certifiably insane."
  • David Lane continues to organize "Renewal Project" gatherings for pastors featuring the likes of Rafael Cruz, E.W. Jackson, and others.
  • Finally, Larry Tomczak says that Beyoncé's "new album Lemonade is scandalous ... This isn't entertainment, it's an outrage, and it's idolatry if we justify it. Our impressionable children are at stake."

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There Is No Trump Pivot

“Donald Trump is campaigning as a general election candidate at this point,” wrote Callum Borchers on the Washington Post’s Fix blog.

NBC News’ Lester Holt said, “Trump's comments appear to signal a more moderate shift, and some are asking if it a sign of things to come," after the Republican Presidential candidate appeared to oppose — albeit briefly — North Carolina’s new anti-LGBT law.

Expect to hear this meme repeated in the media following a foreign policy speech Trump is scheduled to deliver on Wednesday.

The concept of a general election pivot — that candidates can shed extreme and divisive statements and policies as they move from partisan primaries into the general election in order to appeal to a wider swath of the electorate — is at best an exaggerated phenomenon. In the case of Donald Trump, it is an impossibility.

Trump’s conservatism is not based on a set of policy positions that can be slightly modified or added to in order to make them more palatable. His campaign was born in the fringes of the conservative movement.

The American public's memory might be short, but they will not forget that Trump’s presidential campaign is rooted in the birther movement and his doubts about the validity of President Obama’s birth certificate.  

Trump launched his campaign with a racist attack on Mexican immigrants claiming they are “bringing drugs. They're bringing crime. They're rapists.”

He cannot moderate his proposal “for a total and complete shutdown of Muslims entering the United States.”

And Trump cannot force the public to unremember the plethora of sexist statements he has made, from denigrating Carly Fiorina by stating, “Look at that face! Would anyone vote for that? Can you imagine that, the face of our next president?" to his sexist attacks Megyn Kelly.

Trump's controversial statements were not random or an accident. They were designed to curry favor with the far right. In early April Gabe Sherman reported in New York magazine that the Trump campaign's communications efforts began with a study of what appealed to the conservative radio audience.

Throughout 2014, the three fed Trump strategy memos and political intelligence. “I listened to thousands of hours of talk radio, and he was getting reports from me,” [former Trump aide Sam] Nunberg recalled. What those reports said was that the GOP base was frothing over a handful of issues including immigration, Obamacare, and Common Core. While Jeb Bush talked about crossing the border as an “act of love,” Trump was thinking about how high to build his wall. “We either have borders or we don’t,” Trump told the faithful who flocked to the annual CPAC conference in 2014.

A campaign born from the talking points of conservative talk radio hosts can only pivot to the mainstream if the American people develop a collective case of amnesia. That is unlikely to happen in 2016.  

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Bryan Fischer: It's 'Insanity' To Vote For Any Candidate Who Supports Target

Bryan Fischer spent a couple of segments on his radio program today absolutely fuming about Target's announcement that its stores will "welcome transgender team members and guests to use the restroom or fitting room facility that corresponds with their gender identity," a policy that predictably prompted an American Family Association boycott.

Fischer grew increasingly worked up over the fact that only Ted Cruz has taken a stand against this sort of policy, saying that "this is maybe the most bizarre point we have ever reached in American history."

"Only one of the five people that want to be the next president of the United States — only one of them! — is committed to keeping sexual deviants out of our daughters' bathrooms, out of our daughters' locker rooms, our of our daughters' shower rooms and out of our daughters' dressing rooms," Fischer ranted.

"If a presidential candidate is not committed to keeping sexual perverts out of little girls' bathrooms," he continued, "I do not care what else he stands for ... If he won't keep sexual perverts out of little girls' bathrooms, nothing else he says or believes makes any difference to me."

"How in the world could any right-thinking father or mother possibly vote for a candidate like that?" Fischer seethed. "To even consider the possibility of casting a vote for such a person is a form of insanity."

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'Circus And Cakes': Glenn Beck On Bathrooms And How President Trump Will Put Him In Jail

Glenn Beck spent a good bit of time on his radio program today railing against criticism of anti-LGBT laws that have been enacted recently in places like North Carolina and Mississippi before turning around and complaining about how the entire issue is just a "circus" meant to distract from the fact that "world is on fire."

"This is just the new circus and cakes," Beck said (he meant "bread and circuses"). "This is just the new Colosseum. Get them to talk about the bathrooms so they're not talking about Syria, so they're not talking about the debt, so they're not talking about corruption, so they're not talking about Hillary's server. Get them to talk about the bathrooms. This is the new cakes and circuses and it's brilliant because it works."

Then, seemingly realizing the irony of complaining about people talking about this issue after he just spent several minutes talking about this issue, Beck attempted to pivot his way out of his own hypocrisy by going after Donald Trump and President Obama.

"If Donald Trump goes in, he will put us out of business that fast," Beck said, snapping his fingers. "He is not going to put up with people who question his authority. Barack Obama didn't; he put people in jail. Listen to me again: he put people in jail, Barack Obama did, who are in our business for coming out and saying this is what the government's doing. Whistleblowers. More whistleblowers were put in jail than any time since Woodrow Wilson. You don't think this guy's going to do it?"

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Glenn Beck

Alex Jones: Obama Is 'A Demonic Creature' Because There Are 'Flies Always Landing On Him'

Following their discussion of Beyoncé’s brain-eating habits yesterday, conspiracy theorist radio host Alex Jones and extremist pastor James David Manning moved on to Manning’s belief that President Obama may be the Antichrist.

Jones, who only went so far as to say that Obama is “a precursor” to the Antichrist, insisted that Obama is a Muslim who seeks the deaths of Christians and black people and who “has flies always landing on him” and “is involved in every evil you can imagine.”

“He really is a demonic creature,” Jones said. “His wife is demonic. They don’t act or look like any black people I’ve ever known, or any people for that matter. They just are weird.”

Manning explained that “Obama is the son of Satan” and “the emissary for Satan himself” who is even worse than Adolf Hitler, Vladimir Lenin and Mao Zedong because while those leaders killed millions of people, Obama introduced “spiritual evil” to the world through same-sex marriage. He even said that the New World Order will be “led by Obama” as it establishes its control across the globe.

Jones added that Pope Francis is also “like a demon,” while Manning claimed the late musician Prince was also inspired by Satan.

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Jim Bakker: We Are All On Drugs!

Last week, televangelist Jim Bakker sat down with disgraced former FBI agent John Guandolo to discuss the Muslim Brotherhood’s supposed infiltration of the U.S. government (and sell survival food).

Bakker, infuriated that the Obama administration is resettling Syrian refugees in the U.S. and failed to build a wall on the southern border, got up from his chair to tell the audience about how immigration has led to a deluge of drugs and crime and that the refugee population is actually a Trojan Horse for ISIS. He also managed to link the issue to voter fraud.

“We’re like sheep being led to the slaughter,” he said.

Bakker then castigated the audience for not realizing the gravity of the situation, explaining that they must all be on drugs…like his wife and co-host, Lori Bakker, was in her youth. “I don’t see how Christians are sitting back,” he said. “It’s like you’re all on drugs. It’s like all the church people have just taken something.”

“Smoke a lot of pot, to dumb you down, just kind of chill,” Lori Bakker interjected.

“Lori knows, too, because she smoked a lot of pot when she was a girl.”

“Well, yeah, you just — you know, hey.”

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