The Limitless Insanity of Janet Porter

Janet Porter’s most recent WorldNetDaily column almost defies belief, even by the exceedingly low standards that we have for anything she says. 

Just about every crackpot right-wing conspiracy theory has been tossed into Porter’s delusional stew, starting with her declaration that the “Cash for Clunkers” program was really an effort by the government to gain control of “your computer [so it would be] free to intercept, monitor, record, copy, audit, inspect and disclose everything you have to law enforcement – even to ‘foreign officials’ who will apparently have the new authority to monitor you.”

She then dusts off the bogus claim that the Department of Homeland Security called conservatives “the most dangerous domestic terrorism threat in the United States” before claiming that White House Deputy Chief of staff Jim Messina is advising people to beat up those who oppose the administration, which then leads into claims that the White House has set up a network of government informants.

Amazing as it is, this is pretty standard right-wing nuttery. But Porter, never one to stop even when she’s reached the outermost edge, proceeds to go right off the deep end:

Given all that’s already happened, perhaps this next concern isn’t quite so unbelievable.

Swine flu, H1N1, or a crisis they don’t want to go to waste?

Last week’s Pittsburg [sic] Tribune reported: “The Defense Department is talking about establishing regional military teams to aid civilian authorities should there actually be a major outbreak. There’s even talk of troop deployment.”

Now the United States Army, National Guard and even are posting job listings for guards for a civilian internment camp.

They are looking for people who can provide “custody,” “control” and “counseling” of “civilians.” Here’s what’s posted:

As an Internment/Resettlement Specialist for the Army National Guard, you will ensure the smooth running of military confinement/correctional facility or detention/internment facility, similar to those duties conducted by civilian Corrections Officers. This will require you to know proper procedures and military law; and have the ability to think quickly in high-stress situations. Specific duties may include assisting with supervision and management operations; providing facility security; providing custody, control, supervision, and escort; and counseling individual prisoners in rehabilitative programs.

Internment/confinement/correction camps for American civilians? Maybe there’s something to all those rumors of FEMA concentration camps. After all, those internment/resettlement specialists are going to have to report to work somewhere. If you’re going to round up American citizens, you’re going to need a place to put them.

First things first, the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review did in fact write the paragraph Porter quotes … as part of an editorial decrying the fact that “alarmists have taken to banging the orchestral drums heralding the re-emergence of H1N1 swine flu in deafening fashion” and urging them to “chill.”

But instead of chilling, Porter the alarmist took this entirely non-controversial proposal as a sign that the Obama administration was about to set up internment camps and then pointed to a run-of-the-mill National Guard job listing as proof.

Well, you know what? The National Guard has a whole page of job listings on its website that lists dozens of jobs ranging from Cannon Crewmember and Infantryman to Special Forces Weapons Sergeant and M1 Armor Crewman.

So apparently not only is the administration planning on rounding-up and imprisoning conservatives, they are also preparing for an all-out military assault on them.

And I don’t even want to know what horrors await this nation once the Guard fills its quota of tuba, trombone, bassoon, piccolo, and cornet players it is also seeking.

By the way, have I mentioned that Porter served as the co-chair of Mike Huckabee’s Faith and Family Values Coalition and is co-hosting a right-wing conference next month at which Huckabee will be the keynote speaker.  Just think it is important to keep pointing that out.