Swanson: Gay Marriage Leads to Laptop, Pet Rock Marriages; 'Drags Feces' over Institution of Marriage

Fresh after blaming gays and women wearing hats and pants for the Colorado wildfires, Colorado pastors Kevin Swanson and Dave Buehner on Generations Radio have responded to the Supreme Court’s rulings on DOMA and Prop 8 by predicting the legalization of marriages to inanimate objects.

Harkening back to an earlier program about how Star Trek allegedly promotes bestiality, Buehner claimed that “cross-species” marriages and unions with “non-life forms” will soon become all the rage: “there are some people who love their MacBooks.” Swanson even wondered about people who “want to marry their Pet Rock.”

But don’t get too excited about marrying your laptop or Pet Rock just yet, as Swanson notes that “at this point it’s the destruction of civilization.”

Swanson and Buehner both agreed that gay couples don’t actually want to get married but only seek to “stick a finger in the eye of God and to destroy civilization,” and not to mention “drag feces all over one of the most beautiful things God has created.” 

“It’s all about committing cultural suicide,” Swanson explained, “the Supreme Court of the United States took a gun, put it to its own head and pulled the trigger because now we’re looking at a civilization committing suicide.”