Paranoia-Rama

Paranoia-Rama: Hitler's 'Super Gay' Race, Gun Tracking Bracelet Myth & Another Bogus Religious Right Persecution Story

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

Did you know that it is illegal to be a Christian in America? Or that World War II was all about promoting homosexuality?

Probably not, but you might just think that if you get all of your news from the paranoid world of the Religious Right media.

5. Hitler’s Gay Dream

Religious Right talk show host Rick Wiles is not happy about the growing support for gay rights in America, which he believes is really the fulfillment of Adolf Hitler’s dream to engender a “race of super gay male soldiers” that would “slaughter” Christians.

According to Wiles, Nazism and World War II had nothing to do with promoting the supremacy of the “Aryan race,” but were all about Hitler’s plan to create a Christian-killing “homosexual special race.”

His guest, BarbWire editor and pastor Jeff Allen, unsurprisingly agreed.

4. Gays Targeting South Carolina For ‘Recruitment’

South Carolina Republicans are fighting the scourge of gay “recruitment,” which apparently has become a major problem in the Palmetto State. State senator and US Senate candidate Lee Bright, for example, is worried that the “homosexual agenda” has “seized the educational establishment” and has gone on “full march in our institutions of higher ed and we’ve gone from education to indoctrination.”

Fellow GOP state senator Mike Fair similarly fears that a lesbian comedian is “recruiting” students into homosexuality at the University of South Carolina-Upstate, and wants to punish the school along with the College of Charleston for their “glorification of same-sex culture.”

3. Gun Tracking Bracelets A-Comin’

It didn’t take long for conservative media outlets to disseminate the false claim that Attorney General Eric Holder announced he would be exploring “gun tracking bracelets” as part of a looming crackdown on gun rights. Of course, Holder never said that he would be tracking gun owners through bracelets.

As Erich Lach of TPM writes, Holder only “talked about ideas for gun safety technology including finger print identification and a bracelet that ‘talks to’ a gun, to allow use only by the lawful owner,” a technology that many gun manufacturers are working to develop.

Naturally, the story moved up from right-wing pundits to GOP politicians like Mitch McConnell and Sarah Palin, who pushed the gun tracking bracelet myth regardless of the actual facts.

2. Religious Right Persecution Story Debunked, Again

It’s time for another bogus Religious Right tale about persecution in schools, this time in North Carolina. Conservatives were outraged when a teacher allegedly tried to dissuade a student from writing a short essay about how Jesus is her hero, and now there is a phony photo circulating of an essay marked with “F: Remove Jesus Please!”

However, as the myth-busting website Snopes points out, the school explained that the only reason the teacher spoke to the student about the assignment was because the student approached the teacher and told her she is having problems writing it.

“Our school has recently been the target of intense negative publicity in numerous forms of the media,” the school’s principal said in a statement [PDF], noting that at no point was the student pressured to drop Jesus as the subject of the essay and that the finished product “is still entitled, ‘Jesus is my Hero.’”

As is often the case, right-wing activists quickly jumped at the first cry of “persecution!,” without waiting for the facts of the case to come out.

1. Christianity Made Illegal!

Back in 2011, a seniors group affiliated with the Traditional Values Coalition sent out mailers with the headline “Christianity Now Outlawed,” warning that President Obama has declared the Bible to be “illegal hate literature.”

Of course it wasn’t true, but conservative activists every year seem to come up with new ways to claim that it is now against the law to be a Christian.

Just this week, Family Research Council head Tony Perkins said that the gay rights movement is transforming America into Nazi Germany, while Brian Brown of the National Organization for Marriage maintained that Christians are now facing anti-religious Jim Crow laws.

American Family Association spokesman Bryan Fischer took the ridiculousness to a new level, declaring that “it is now a criminal offense according to the Supreme Court of the United States, it is now a punishable offense, you can be fined for being a Christian in the United States of America. For living, behaving as a Christian, it has now become a crime in the United States of America.”

Paranoia-Rama: Satan's Gay Graham Crackers, Obama's 'Illegal Alien Hordes' & 'The Communist States Of America'

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

Every time we think we are tired and bored from hearing the constant complaints from far-right pundits about how President Obama is a communist tyrant, they always seem to find new ways to entertain us. Maybe they will eventually move on to more pressing issues, like Satan’s use of graham crackers to advance homosexuality.

5. Satanic Graham Crackers

Joining other anti-gay activists calling for a boycott of Honey Maid graham crackers because of a TV ad featuring a gay couple, the American Decency Association said this week that the company’s “This Is Wholesome” ad is proof of Satanic deception: “Satan wants us to see sin as normal and not so bad…. Honey Maid and others are putting two moms in a same-sex relationship. They are making two dads to seem normal. Both are wrong; both are unwholesome; both run contrary to the Word of God.”

The group adds:

It’s not a matter of acceptance; it’s a matter of an evil agenda which is being pushed upon America and around the world. Satan continues to attack God’s design and skew it to his own workings. He continues to take words like “wholesome” and “family” and twist them for his own purposes. He takes a symbol of God’s promise (the rainbow) and hijacks it, twisting it to his own design. Satan calls it normal; God calls it sin. We live in a day when “evil” is called “good” and “good” is called “evil.” That which is meant to glorify God (family, the church, etc) is being taken and bent out of shape until it is hardly recognizable.

Honey Maid offered this moving response to their critics:

4. Revolt Against Obama’s ‘Communist States Of America’

Liberty Counsel attorney Matt Barber’s weekly columns are so consistently ridiculous (and unintentionally hilarious) that they seem to be written by a liberal trying to make conservatives look bad. Barber didn’t disappoint with his latest commentary accusing President Obama of bringing communism to America.

“[N]early every adult who, at any time, was in any position of influence over a young, soon-to-be-radicalized Barry Soetoro was an avowed communist,” Barber writes. “To all this I say, if the jackboot fits, wear it. If it quacks like a commie and goose-steps like a commie, then a commie it is.”

He concludes by calling for a revolt against Obama: “We are no longer the United States of America. We have become The Communist States of America. Which means, for those who love liberty, revolution is once again at hand.”

3. Tea Party Group Embraces ‘Sandy Hook Truthers’

The National Liberty Foundation, a Florida-based Tea Party group, is now pushing the latest “Sandy Hook truther” conspiracy that President Obama orchestrated the school shooting in order to justify a crackdown on gun rights: “This my dear friends was all staged… we didn’t believe it at the time, but this is how far your president went to get your guns…. Don’t let anything he does surprise you… He wants to be a dictator, he doesn’t want to get out of the White House and he loves spending your money… Hmmm, I wonder where their off to next?”

The group posted an image of a the razed Sandy Hook elementary, which was demolished after the town voted to tear down the school, to claim that the administration is “destroying the evidence.” The group also advanced the conspiracy theory that the same female actress was photographed at the Sandy Hook, Aurora and Boston Marathon bombing aftermaths.

Raw Story notes that the Tea Party group also “questioned whether Malaysian Airlines Flight 370 was hijacked and taken to a ‘secret U.S. military base on a remote island in the Indian Ocean.’”

2. Obama ‘Destabilizing’ America With ‘Hordes Of Dangerous Illegal Aliens’

Fox News has jumped on a misleading Center for Immigration Studies report that dishonestly accuses the Obama administration of releasing “68,000 convicted criminal aliens” last year.

Fox pundit Todd Starnes called the report “indisputable proof that the Obama Administration is destabilizing the nation by allowing hordes of dangerous illegal aliens to invade the country,” telling listeners of his radio bulletin to “be prepared to take whatever measures necessary to protect your family and your home.

This is not a time to be politically correct so here’s the cold hard reality - the United States is being invaded. And the Obama administration has been complicit in the invasion. Instead of repelling the invasion, the Obama administration is welcoming the invaders with open arms and providing them food stamps, driver’s licenses and health insurance.

Now we know how the Ukrainians feel.

It’s beyond frightening to imagine that our own government as unleashed this kind of evil on our streets. And heaven forbid, these illegals harm our wives and children. Should that happen, their blood is on the Obama Administration’s hands.

As Media Matters has documented, Starnes was not the only Fox commentator to use the report to promote anti-immigrant views.

However, Fox News Latino pointed out the serious flaws in the report, which unfortunately will go unnoticed by most Fox viewers.

1. Celebrating Health Insurance Enrollments Proves Obama’s A Dictator

Glenn Beck is so outraged that the “sociopath” President Obama organized a press conference to hail the millions of people who enrolled in health insurance plans under the Affordable Care Act, that he insisted he is “not going to pay attention” to Obama anymore… but nonetheless went on an epic rant where he criticized the “rat bastards” in the media and attacked Obama as a “full-fledged dictator.”

Paranoia-Rama: Disney's Gay Witches, Satan's Secret Plan & Rush Limbaugh's Latest Conspiracy

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

After turning the children of America gay, it turns out that Disney’s hit film Frozen is also tricking kids into embracing witchcraft. Of course, that is just one of several anti-gay conspiracy theories we uncovered this week.

5. Gays Part Of New World Order/Freemason/Marxist Conspiracy

Religious Right pastor Scott Lively, who has played a role in influencing anti-gay laws in countries such as Uganda and Russia, explained in a recent interview that he believes the gay rights movement is a demonic, Marxist and Masonic plot to impose the New World Order.

“The whole New World Order system is a Marxist system, and there are different components of it, but the fact is that the homosexuals are the foot soldiers, they’re the main foot soldiers of this agenda,” he said.

4. Muslim-Americans Putting Republicans In ‘The Back Of The Bus’

GOP politician Lou Ann Zelenick has dedicated her career to opposing the right of Muslim residents of Murfreesboro, Tennessee, to build a mosque in their town. After losing that battle, now anti-Muslim activists have moved on to fighting the planned construction of a cemetery next to the mosque.

At a recent court hearing addressing the legal challenge against the cemetery, Zelenick and her supporters snapped at a Muslim student journalist and a reporter for the local NBC affiliate.

Zelenick told the student journalist that she is “tired of having to be at the back of the bus.”

3. Frozen Turns Kids To Witchcraft

After arguing that the Disney film Frozen is turning children gay, pastor and radio host Kevin Swanson is now worried that Frozen is luring kids into witchcraft. While speaking with his co-host Steve Vaughn, who alleged that Frozen undermines faith in God, Swanson said that Frozen and other “magical tales turn out to be a means by which children are led into witchcraft.”

2. Arrests Of Democrats Are Part Of A Democratic Conspiracy

Leave it to Rush Limbaugh to claim that the arrests of three Democratic politicians on corruption charges are part of a Democratic conspiracy. Yesterday, Limbaugh said that FBI investigations into the elected officials are part of a Democratic plot to purge the party of “bad apples” before the midterm election in November: “It is entirely possible that what is going on here is that the head honchos of the Democrat party [sic] are basically behind an effort to take out all of their bad apples before the election, make them old news by the time the election comes around. The timing here is obviously curious and it really is hard to believe the FBI would be working against the wishes of the regime. Isn’t it?”

1. Satan Behind Abortion Rights, Gay Equality

According to televangelist Pat Robertson, Satan is the driving laws to protect abortion rights and legal equality for gays and lesbians as part of his attempt to wipe out the human race and “oppress” people of faith.

Robertson explained his views during a rant in which he insisted that Jesus wouldn’t have served a gay couple because the couple would have already been stoned to death.

Paranoia-Rama: Gays Destroying The Economy, CIA's Feminist Infiltration & Antichrist Obama

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

Before the Internet becomes censored by our Chinese-Islamist overlords, right-wing figures would like you to know that America is being destroyed by feminism, gay rights and President Obama (who may or may not be the Antichrist). Not that any of that matters anyway, because it is all really a distraction from Benghazi.

5. Gay Rights Lead To Economic Collapse

Family Research Council president Tony Perkins has been dismayed by growing calls within the GOP to “agree to disagree on social issues” like marriage equality. Perkins insists that treating gay people equally under the law will have dangerous, unforeseen economic consequences.

He explains that gay rights will weaken America in the eyes of the world, encouraging countries like Russia to move against the US Dollar and throw the economy into chaos. “So there goes the economy all because we ignored the morality of the issues of this administration,” Perkins warns.

4. CIA Ruined Feminism

InfoWars host Alex Jones warned this week that “true feminism,” which he explained is all about preserving the patriarchy and maintaining high fertility rates, is under attack by Beyoncé Knowles-Carter and secret CIA agents like Gloria Steinem.

Feminism, Jones added, has become “a top down system of control used to divide and conquer and is run by powerful individuals who care little for actual women’s rights.” He also blamed “establishment feminism” for things such as genetically modified foods, vaccines, estrogen mimickers and metrosexual men.

3. Obama Giving China, Islamists Control Of The Internet

A decision to relinquish federal control of the Internet has sparked outrage from Republican politicians and Fox News pundits, who argue that the move will empower countries like China and Russia. As it turns out, the decision, which has been in the works since 1998, actually limits the influence of other governments and the United Nations.

But the world of right-wing conspiracies seem impenetrable to such facts. Take for example a recent warning from Center for Security Policy head Frank Gaffney, who predicted that “stealth jihadist groups” will now have increased control of the Internet.

2. Antichrist Alert

It turns out that Hillary Clinton isn’t the Antichrist after all, as it is Barack Obama who really has been the Antichrist all along. Mark Creech of the Christian Action League, which is the American Family Association’s North Carolina chapter, wrote that America will soon be destroyed like Babel for putting Obama, whom he seems to think is the Antichrist, in the White House.

Religious Right columnist Michael Bresciani didn’t go as far as Creech but noted that the Antichrist will look a lot like Obama: “Being the incarnation of the Devil himself means that his view is always the exact opposite of God and is always wrong. A perfect type of the antichrist is Barack Obama.”

1. Missing Plane Coverage Is A Distraction From Benghazi

Since the sad and cynical politicization of the 2012 Benghazi attack will never end, conservative media personalities are now charging that coverage of the missing Malaysia Airlines plane is a media strategy to distract from Benghazi. Of course, repeated reports — including a GOP-led House study — have discredited the conspiracy theories surrounding the attack and its aftermath, but Fox News is intent on incorporating Benghazi into its Malaysia Airlines reporting.

Bill O’Reilly said the press is only covering the Malaysia Airlines incident because it “doesn’t want to cover important stories like the IRS and Benghazi” while Peter Johnson Jr. wondered why “newscasts don’t focus on things like Benghazi, Fast & Furious, and IRS.” Fellow Fox News hosts Andrea Tantaros and Ralph Peters compared the missing plane to the Benghazi attack.

Paranoia-Rama: Frozen's Gay Manipulation, America's Demonic Curse & Gay Breeding Slaves

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

There are a lot of problems in America today, and as we all know they are a result of Disney’s “pro-homosexual” agenda, Common Core and ancient Egyptian curses.

5. America Was Cursed By Ancient Egyptians

Did you know that ancient, Baal-worshiping Egyptians came to North America long ago and put the continent under a demonic curse? Well you do now! Just let pastor John Benefiel, who helped Gov. Rick Perry organize his The Response prayer rally, explain:

4. Gay Men Will Turn Women Into Slaves

Anti-gay activist and self-published gay erotic fiction author Robert Oscar Lopez is out with a new warning about gay men planning to turn surrogate mothers into their slaves, which he believes is all part of their sexist approach to women.

“Gestational surrogacy is a dream come true for woman-hating chauvinists who are bound to congregate under such an umbrella: men enjoy all the 'phallic' privilege that the bourgeois patriarchy can provide, and women are put in their place,” Lopez writes in his bizarre post on The American Thinker.

“For some time I have pointed out that the 13th and 14th Amendments are separated by only three years, and therefore the gay marriage proponents ought not to be able to cite the 14th Amendment without addressing the fact that champions of dad-only families seem to clash openly with what’s stated in the 13th against slavery.”

3. Send Common Core Proponents To Hell

As Alabama lawmakers debate the future of implementing Common Core standards, one Tea Party leader told members of the State Senate’s Education Committee that those who vote in favor of Common Core are putting their eternal souls at risk.

Tea Party activist Mia Raven warned that Common Core promotes an “anti-Christian, anti-Catholic and anti-American” curriculum that “include[s] far-left proposals such as acceptance of homosexuality, alternate lifestyles, radical feminism, abortion, illegal immigration and the redistribution of wealth.”

“We don’t want our children to lose their innocence, beginning in preschool or kindergarten, told that homosexuality is okay and should be experienced at an early age and that same-sex marriages are okay,” he said. “Do you want this on your record when you come to the End of Days, knowing the Master Teacher said, ‘As much as you’ve done to the little ones, you’ve done it unto me’?”

2. Stop Persecuting Ben Carson!

Ben Carson has made a career out of delivering speeches attacking President Obama, an impressive feat considering that he’s lost his freedom of speech and is facing Nazi-like persecution. After his speech at CPAC where he warned that the “PC Police” are trying to “shut me up,” Carson told Breitbart News that the United States government is now “very much like Nazi Germany” and that political correctness is “creating a horrible schism that will destroy our nation.” In a separate interview with Tony Perkins of the Family Research Council, he said that he is losing his First Amendment rights.

None of this is new from Carson, who previously said that “we live in a Gestapo age” because progressives in America are doing “what Hitler was doing.”

Somehow, he continues to keep giving all these interviews and speeches even though he insists that he is losing his right to speak, and will probably continue doing so as long as conservative audiences keep buying his absurd claims and Nazi analogies.

1. ‘Frozen’ Turns Kids Gay

Colorado-based pastor and Religious Right activist Kevin Swanson is warning parents that the hit Disney movie Frozen is actually a demonically-inspired attempt to make their children gay.

Swanson, who has suggested that the death penalty is an appropriate punishment for homosexuality, said that he knows Frozen is turning kids gay because he is most certainly “not a tinfoil hat conspiratorialist.”

Paranoia-Rama: CPAC Edition

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

This week, here at Right Wing Watch we have been monitoring the Conservative Political Action Conference, the American Conservative Union’s annual summit that has been packed with typical right-wing blustering over taxesBenghazi, Ronald Reagan, not to mention plenty of good old fashioned anti-government conspiracy theories:

5) Wayne LaPierre’s American Nightmare

NRA head Wayne LaPierre told CPAC attendees yesterday that “political and media elites” have conspired against gun owners and conservatives in general, working to “punish anyone who disagrees.”

“The media's intentional corruption of the truth is an abomination and NRA members will never, and I mean never, submit or surrender to the national media,” he said.

Even though crime rates have been falling steadily since the 1990s, LaPierre described his dark vision of an America in which happy and peaceful neighborhoods have been transformed into places of violence and death filled with “knockout-gamers.”

4) IRS Just As Bad As Deposed Leader Of Ukraine

Plenty of CPAC speakers have mentioned the crisis in Ukraine as a supposed failure of President Obama, but Tom Fitton of Judicial Watch went as far as comparing the Obama administration to the government of overthrown Ukrainian president and Putin ally Viktor Yanukovych.

Andy Kroll of Mother Jones reports that Fitton told attendees of CPAC’s “IRS Targeting Scandal: Protecting the Voice of the People” panel that Obama’s IRS, which has been falsely accused of targeting conservative groups, is operating much like how the Yanukovych government violently suppressed anti-government protesters: “People are dying in the streets in Ukraine. People being oppressed by the political regime. That's what the IRS was doing.”

3) Trump’s Immigration Solutions

Donald Trump seems to think Jimmy Carter is dead, and that the US may die too if Congress passes immigration reform. The real estate mogul told CPAC yesterday that immigration reform would mean that America would no longer exist, as immigrants flood into the country, destroy the GOP and “take your job.”

2) Muslim Brotherhood Infiltration of CPAC

Anti-Muslim activist Frank Gaffney hosted an alternative CPAC event yesterday, prompted in part by worries that the right-wing gathering has been infiltrated by the Muslim Brotherhood through Republican activists such as Grover Norquist and Suhail Khan. Gaffney joined other conservatives in denouncing Norquist and Khan as Muslim Brotherhood agents who are advancing “civilization jihad” and undermining America.

Diana West yesterday took to WorldNetDaily to warn CPAC that Norquist and Khan are “a pair of influential men with track records of working with America’s enemies – Islamic organizations the U.S. government has linked to the Muslim Brotherhood and larger world of jihad.” She claimed that they are allied with those who hope “to destroy the United States and transform what is left into an Islamic-ruled land,” and pushed the Muslim Brotherhood “straight into the inner sanctum of the Bush White House.”

1) President Obama Is George Wallace

When the Justice Department challenged Louisiana’s voucher scheme over evidence that the program would resegregate the state’s schools, conservatives were unsurprisingly outraged. At CPAC today, Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal and Religious Right leader Ralph Reed likened President Obama and Attorney General Eric Holder to segregationist Alabama governor George Wallace.

Paranoia-Rama: Obama's Homo Demons, President Satan & Arizona Penis Cakes

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

Apparently, Satan is going to install the next president, use gay people to destroy the black community and take over the world to bring about the Last Days. But at least we can enjoy “penis cakes” before the world comes to an end.

5) Obamacare Race War

Just as Ted Nugent isn’t actually sorry for calling President Obama a “subhuman mongrel,” the National Rifle Association board member and Republican surrogate also isn’t backing down from his statements likening President Obama to the Nazis.

When conservative talk show host Dennis Miller told Nugent he didn’t buy his Nazi comparison, Nugent insisted that the president is using the IRS and the health care reform law to spark a race war “like the brownshirts.” Media Matters grabbed the clip:

4) Satan Will Put A Witch In The White House

The Trinity Broadcasting Network considers Kim Clement a prophet, and so should you! The TBN host recently prophesied that Satan will “put a witch in the White House” who will advance the demonic spirit of “Jezebel,” and can only be stopped by a socialism-slaying politician.

3) Penis Cakes On The Way

Tea Party Nation head Judson Phillips is aggrieved that Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer vetoed her state’s ‘right-to-discriminate’ bill, a decision which he believes will lead to “tyranny,” “fascism” and “slavery.” In fact, he believes that bakers will now be forced to bake penis cakes:

Should a devote baker be required to create a cake for a homosexual wedding that has a giant phallic symbol on it or should a baker be required to create pastries for a homosexual wedding in the shape of genitallia [sic]? Or should a photographer be required to photograph a homosexual wedding where the participants decide they want to be nude or engage in sexual behavior?

We’re not sure what sort of weddings Phillips is used to attending, but we wish we had been invited.

2) The World Has Gone Gay

Scott Lively has been on a roll lately after launching a new anti-gay group, insisting that his fight against gay rights is literally a life-or-death battle against Satan. During an interview with Janet Mefferd where he explained why he believes LGBT equality is triggering the coming of the End Times, Lively said that there should be a “revolution” to defeat the socialist “conspiracy” aimed at “homosexualizing the whole world.”

1) Beware Obama’s ‘Homo Demons’

Far-far-right pastor James David Manning is at it again, this time hailing anti-gay leaders in Uganda, Gambia and Nigeria for resisting “this son of Satan Barack Hussein Obama” and his “anti-integrity, anti-life, anti-humanity, anti-universal understanding, anti-DNA” gay rights agenda.

Manning said that the decisions of Jason Collins and Michael Sam to come out of the closet are proof that “Obama has released these demons particularly upon the black males, this homosexual demon, hoping to influence as many black males to subscribe to ideas that are [as] homosexual, perverted, LGBT as possible.”

“Obama has released the homo demons on the black man; look out black woman, a white homo may take your man.” He said that under Obama’s direction, black men “are being scooped up by white homos,” thus destroying the black family.

The white homo is now moving into the black neighborhoods, looking for black men that have been converted into homosexuality. Black woman let me say something to you: You will have a very hard time competing against a white homosexual male, he’s usually got money, a white homo usually has an American Express card, he usually has an opportunity at the theatre, homos love the theatre, they love to go out to dinner parties, they love that kind of a thing. As a black woman you can’t compete not only with the financial strength of a white homo, black sister, this is devastating, black people need to rise up en masse and recognize the utter destruction that Obama is going in to destroy the black family with his homosexual statements and release of demons that he has done.

Paranoia-Rama: Parent-Child Marriages Coming Soon, The Devil's United Nations & Michael Sam Is Aiding The Antichrist

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right. 

This week, we learn that NFL prospect Michael Sam helped usher in the reign of the Antichrist by coming out of the closet, although apparently the Devil already controls the United Nations.

5. Satan Behind United Nations

The United Nations released a report this month that is heavily critical of the Roman Catholic Church’s handling of sex abuse cases. Church spokesmen were outraged by the scope of the study. “The range of the report appeared to infuriate the Vatican,” the Washington Post reported. “In blunt language, the committee took particular aim at church stances on sexual orientation, reproductive health and gender equality.”

Austin Ruse of the Catholic Family & Human Rights Institute (C-FAM) blamed Satan for the investigation. “Only the Devil could tell children they have a right to sex and abortion,” Ruse said in a message to C-FAM members.

“This committee has basically said that children have a right under this treaty to have sex, to use condoms and to get abortions. And that Church opposition to this is a violation of human rights,” Ruse said. “This Committee actually told the Church that its teaching on homosexuality has caused violence against the same-sex attracted.”

“What these radicals need a good shaking.”

4. Immigrants Will Turn Us Into Slaves

Phyllis Schlafly has been making the rounds on right-wing media to push her claim that Latino immigrants don’t share American values because they are less likely to vote Republican and back a right-wing political agenda. InfoWars host Alex Jones strongly agreed with Schlafly, and warned that immigrants will team up with George Soros to “support literally making those of us that produce their slaves.”

“This takes us back to a democracy where two wolves can vote to eat the sheep for dinner,” Jones said.

3. Michael Sam Helping The Gay Antichrist

Southern Baptist preacher Dwight McKissic is joining other anti-gay activists in criticizing Michael Sam, the University of Missouri defensive end who recently came out of the closet.

McKissic is especially concerned that the likely NFL draft pick will “become the face of the ‘gay rights’ movement that takes us down the road to Sodom and Gomorrah at a record setting pace.” America’s transformation into Sodom, McKissic warns, will bring about the coming of the Antichrist, who he thinks will probably be gay.

2. Google, Gawker Are Persecuting WorldNetDaily

WorldNetDaily insists that Google is unjustly threatening it for violating the company’s ad policy regarding the use of “derogatory racial or ethnic slurs to refer to an individual or group.” Adam Weinstein at Gawker noted that the right-wing website has published 670 stories on “black mob” violence, while WND editor Joseph Farah offered a less-than-convincing defense of WND’s handling of race issues.

Now Farah is striking back, arguing that Gawker has pretty much ruined the Internet with its “venomous, personal, ad hominem, groundless attack” against him.

“It’s mean-spirited. It’s irresponsible. It’s childish and immature,” Farah writes in an editorial today. “You can see it for yourself, but I would caution you the coarse, vulgar language and name-calling is pretty rough. Don’t blame me. I’m just the target. Visitor beware.” Thanks to Gawker, this “early Internet entrepreneur and pioneer” is “starting to hate the Internet.”

Farah added: “I wonder if people like this Gawker guy would allow his children to read his posts – if he has children or knows any. I guess it would be even more disturbing if he would or does. What are their standards? Do they have any? Is it supposed to be funny?”

1. Gay Marriage Leads To Parent-Child Marriage

Mitch McConnell’s GOP primary challenger Matt Bevin is doing the best he can to link the incumbent senator to a recent federal court ruling that struck down part of Kentucky’s ban on same-sex marriage. The Tea Party-backed candidate told a Religious Right talk show host this week that if same-sex marriage becomes legal, soon parents will be able to marry their children.

Bevin’s campaign spokesman defended his remarks and accused Right Wing Watch of “gross misrepresentation” of the candidate’s comments…which we merely quoted verbatim.

Paranoia-Rama: Disney's Gay Demons, Obama's Nazi Plot & The Revenge Of The Illuminati

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

The tired old arguments about gay recruitment seem to never die… but maybe our new Illuminati overlords will save folks like Rush Limbaugh from the gay menace.

5. Marriage Equality Makes Kids Gay

Tony Perkins of the Family Research Council debated a caller on his radio show, Washington Watch, about why the FRC uses the phrase “natural marriage” since the definition of marriage has fluctuated over history and throughout different cultures.

Ultimately, Perkins tried to make the argument that marriage equality for same-sex couples will ultimately turn kids gay and make children obsessed with sex. The FRC head even worried that students will stop learning about science and reading comprehension as schools morph into sexual instruction laboratories.

That’s funny, because Education Weekly’s 2013 top three states for education — Maryland, Massachusetts and New York — have all legalized same-sex marriage.

4. The Illuminati Runs America

Newt Gingrich seems to be selling his email list to just about anybody, as sponsors seem to be out-competing each other to come up with the most bizarre and conspiratorial email to stir up fear among Gingrich fans.

Recent sponsor emails have purported to expose the “the 7 Deadly Drugs the U.S. Government can’t wait for you to swallow,” the missing gold in Fort Knox, a secret cancer cure hidden by the government and President Obama’s “secret mistress.”

One email, Media Matters points out, claims that the “Illuminati was behind every consequential wealth event of the past year,” warning that the group has “a deathgrip [sic] on America.” “Once on the brink of extinction, the secret society has powerfully re-emerged in the United States. In fact, it now wields more power than ever.”

3. Demons Run The Disney Channel

Gordon Klingenschmitt is worried that Disney is “recruiting our culture into an aberrant lifestyle” after the Disney Channell featured a same-sex couple on the show “Good Luck Charlie,” a move that incensed anti-gay activists.

According to Klingenschmitt, Disney’s attempt “to push a gay agenda upon your family” is the result of the “influence of demonic spirits who want to recruit your children into sin.”

2. Rush Limbaugh Fears Gay ‘Assault’ On Straight People

Right-wing pundit Rush Limbaugh fears that “we’re fast approaching a world where it ain’t cool to be straight,” a revelation he made in response to defensive-end Michael Sam’s decision to come out of the closet.

The thrice-divorced talk show host was upset about Sam’s announcement, fearing that it will lead to a new gay tyranny where the heterosexual majority is “under assault by the 2-5 percent that are homosexual.”

1. Obama Turning America Into Nazi Germany

Right-wing darling Ben Carson is afraid that today’s “secular progressive movement” is doing “what Hitler was doing.” He even envies Vladimir Putin’s Russia for “gaining prestige and influence throughout the world” by “warming to religion,” unlike the “godless” United States.

Carson said that as a result of the work of the “extremely intolerant” left, Americans now “live in a Gestapo age.”

Paranoia-Rama: Satan's Grammys, Obama's Internment Camps, & Lego's Anti-Business Brainwashing

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

Children are our future, and our friends at Fox News warn us that “The Lego Movie” is trying to brainwash them into becoming mini-Marxists.

Maybe these communist kids will then take part in President Obama’s plan, revealed to us by Glenn Beck, to round up his enemies and force them into internment camps? We’re not saying for sure, just asking the question!

5. Legos Out To Destroy Capitalism

Fox Business Network is worried that “The Lego Movie,” “The Muppets” and “RoboCop” are attempting to “indoctrinate kids” with “anti-capitalist messages” … just like “It’s A Wonderful Life.”

Host Monica Crowley even cheered on It’s a Wonderful Life villain Mr. Potter, which makes this Jimmy Kimmel sketch seem all too real.

4. 'Al Franken Wants To Require Pedophilia In All Public Schools'

In an absurd — even for him — email to members of his Pray In Jesus Name Project, right-wing activist Gordon Klingenschmitt insists that Sen. Al Franken’s Student Non-Discrimination Act will “require pedophilia in all public schools” and “require pro-gay child recruiting.”

But don’t worry, Klingenschmitt says he can stop Franken’s “‘No Child Left Unmolested’ amendment” through faxes (and your financial contribution): “Do you want Al Franken legislating pedophiles to recruit your kids? Let's petition all 535 Congressmen and Senators to STOP Franken's child-abuse.”

3. Satan’s Grammys

Leave it to Religious Right radio host Kevin Swanson to explain how the 2014 Grammy Awards transformed into a “satanic pagan orgy” that celebrated “fornication, twerking, stripping and satanic rituals.”

Of course, Swanson explains, the music industry’s “demonic approach to things” really traces back to The Beatles.

2. Antichrist 2016

Far-right pundits are still debating whether President Obama is the Antichrist or merely setting the stage for the Antichrist, but at least one Republican congressional candidate believes he has identified the Antichrist’s identity: Hillary Clinton.

Ryan Zinke, a Montana GOP state senator who is running for an open U.S. House seat, called Clinton the Antichrist during a campaign speech, which ended with him “handing out 50-calibre bullets to each of the four men who sponsored the event before a crowd of about 30 people.”

The Republican politician later backtracked when his remarks generated national headlines, saying that he was only joking and that he regretted that his comments were “a little bit harsh.”

1. Internment Camps A-Coming

Glenn Beck floated the FEMA camps conspiracy theory in 2009 before he eventually renounced it, but that doesn’t mean he stopped thinking that President Obama or his allies are planning to establish internment camps as part of a burgeoning police state.

Just this week, Beck suggested that the government may begin to round up Obamacare critics, abortion rights opponents and climate change deniers. He even unveiled a new claim about how the Obama administration may cause another war against Israel in order to force Jewish Americans and supporters of Israel into camps.

Paranoia-Rama: 'Homo-Hunting,' Progressive 'Kristallnacht,' & Beyoncé's Demons

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

Nazism has come to America, and its first victims will be Dinesh D’Souza, the super-rich and the people of Montana.. or so we are told in this week’s edition of Paranoia-Rama.

5. Beyoncé Is Possessed By Demons

Earlier this month, we learned that Beyoncé is somehow contributing to sex trafficking. But leave it to Bryan Fischer to inform us that Beyoncé is also under the control of demons, specifically a demon that goes by the name “Sasha Fierce.”

4. Obama Declares War On Montana

We already knew that the Environmental Protection Agency is behind a secret anti-gun plot, but now it turns out that the EPA is also attempting to “depopulate Montana” by “seizing millions of acres of land from their present American owners and transferring its ownership to their indigenous population in areas known as Indian Reservations.”

If Montanans don’t bow to the EPA and leave their state, we won’t be surprised if they end up in a FEMA coffin!

3. Gay Rights Advocates To Blame For Looming ‘Homo-Hunting’ Season

Far-right pundit Erik Rush predicts a coming wave of violent “homo-hunting” attacks on gay people, and the only people to blame are gay people themselves. Rush explains that gay rights advocates like Sally Kohn have so upset people with their “obnoxious” behavior and “anal fisting labs in grade school” that eventually people will react with violence against their gay neighbors.

2. Progressive Kristallnacht Against The 1% Is Imminent

The poor, persecuted, $380,000 watch-wearing 1% have finally found someone who will speak up for their historically underrepresented group, and that person is venture capitalist Tom Perkins. In a letter to the editor of the Wall Street Journal, Perkins found “parallels of fascist Nazi Germany to its war on its ‘one percent,’ namely its Jews, to the progressive war on the American one percent, namely the ‘rich.’”

“Kristallnacht was unthinkable in 1930; is its descendant ‘progressive’ radicalism unthinkable now,” he concluded.

After offering a classic non-apology apology for the patently offensive letter, Perkins played the victim and naturally won support from Glenn BeckFox Business and the Wall Street Journal.

1. McDonnell and D’Souza Are Being Persecuted!

Conservatives from Matt Drudge to Ted Cruz suggest that politics is behind the prosecutions of former Virginia governor Bob McDonnell, indicted for accepting illegal gifts, and conservative author Dinesh D’Souza, who has been indicted for making straw donations to failed Republican senate candidate and college pal Wendy Long.

Claims that the indictments were motivated by anti-GOP politics rather than actual evidence are so absurd that they sound as if they come from InfoWars host Alex Jones.

In fact, Jones offered his own commentary and agreed that the McDonnell’s and D’Souza’s legal troubles are signs of Obama’s “reign of terror.” “This is like Nazi Germany, this is what happens, this is how freedom fails,” Jones said.

Paranoia-Rama: Girls Ruin The World, MLK's Real Legacy, And The Origin Of Autism

RWW's Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

This week, we learn that women are to blame for sexual assaults and sex trafficking, take a new look at the Civil Rights Movement, and announce some new medical discoveries.

5. TSA Electric Shock Bracelets, Brain Microchips & High-Speed Rail Leading to Government Control

Buzzfeed this week dug up the website for Founder’s Truth, a group formerly led by Greg Brannon, who is now a Republican candidate for Senate from North Carolina.

It turns out that Brannon’s group’s website was chock full of conspiracy theories, most revolving around various sorts of technology leading to government control. Blog posts on the site alleged that the Aurora movie theater massacre was an inside job orchestrated by “psyop pros” in order to tighten the government’s grasp on the population; that the TSA might force people to wear bracelets that would “deliver an electric shock if they got out of line”; that corporations are scheming to plant microchips in our brains; that light rail systems in American cities are part of a nefarious United Nations plot; that the fluoridation of water is “unethical and criminal” and something about a “secret police murder and cover-up.”

We are looking forward to Senate hearings on these issues once Brannon is elected.

4. Martin Luther King, Jr, Didn’t Actually Favor Civil Rights

In a Martin Luther King, Jr Day interview with Steve Deace, the Institute on the Constitution’s Michael Peroutka presented the novel theory that the renowned civil rights leader never actually supported civil rights . Instead, Peroutka argued, King’s modern-day followers have “perverted” his legacy to suggest that King was fighting for rights from the government. He also asserted that King – who famously supported robust federal aid to low-income people – would definitely not have supported federal aid to low-income people.

Peroutka’s shaky understanding of the Civil Rights Movement shouldn’t exactly come as a surprise – after all, he is a proud member of the neo-confederate group League of the South.

Peroutka’s MLK Day revisionism is part of a larger trend among the Right to pretend that the Civil Rights Movement’s goals have been achieved and that it is now white people who are facing discrimination. This week, the American Family Association’s Sandy Rios, claimed that, “for the most part, the American Anglo-Saxon crew really has moved past racism, they did it quite a long time ago…But it seems to be raging, racism seems to be raging in the black community.” For his part, columnist Erik Rush claimed that President Obama is actually “enslaving and oppressing” white people.

3. President Obama and Sandra Fluke To Blame For Sexual Assaults on Campus

Family Research Council president Tony Perkins smelled a rat in President Obama’s push to combat sexual assaults on college campuses. In an email to FRC’s members yesterday, Perkins contended that it was President Obama himself who had led to an epidemic of sexual assaults on campuses…by requiring insurance companies to cover contraception, admitting to smoking pot as a kid, and once mentioning a happy hour.

In a radio commentary later in the day, Perkins extended the blame to Sandra Fluke, the former Georgetown law student who faced vicious attacks from the Right for her advocacy in favor of contraception coverage.

2. Gay People Cause Autism

Susanne Atanus, a Republican candidate for U.S. House in Illinois, told the Chicago Daily Herald that autism and dementia, along with extreme weather like tornadoes, are God’s punishments for marriage equality and abortion .

“God is angry,” she said. “We are provoking him with abortions and same-sex marriage and civil unions. Same-sex activity is going to increase AIDS. If it’s in our military it will weaken our military. We need to respect God.”

Atanus previously claimed that the stock market crash of 1929 didn’t actually happen.

1. Beyoncé Leading Women Into Sex Trafficking

Christian Post columnist Larry Tomczak took issue this week with First Lady Michelle Obama’s description of Beyoncé as “a true role model for children.”

The pop star, Tomczak contends, has squandered her “gifts from almighty God in song and dance” and “chose to develop her persona as a sexy, seductive singer.” Tomczak warns that Beyonce’s example could “lead naive young girls on a dangerous path that could lead some even into sex trafficking”…and from there, to “abuse, abortions and abasement-sometimes death.”

Paranoia-Rama: Obama's 'Brown Shirts,' Homophobia In Russia & The Threat Of Demon Pot

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

Old conspiracy theories about gays and lesbians preying on children and President Obama confiscating guns and targeting white people live on in right-wing circles. The same goes with fears about marijuana, as exorcist/GOP politician Gordon Klingenschmitt has his own feelings about “Reefer Madness.”

5. ‘The Brown Shirts Are Next’

Latching onto the right-wing conspiracy that President Obama is using health care reform to create his own army modeled after Adolf Hitler’s Brown Shirts, South Carolina US Senate candidate Lee Bright alleged that Obama is turning the IRS into a paramilitary force to implement Obamacare.

The Republican state senator seems to be unaware that the IRS practices of training certain agents in law enforcement operations didn’t start under Obama but in the 1920s. File this under Obama Derangement Syndrome.

4. Obamacare Is Coming For Your Guns

In a totally not-crazy email entitled “All Hell is Breaking Loose!,” Gun Owners of America warned members that “Obama’s war on individual privacy” is lurching into doctors’ offices through Obamacare.

“[T]he ObamaCare program sets the stage for compiling a national health database which could be trolled by the FBI and could strip tens of millions of Americans of their Second Amendment rights,” the message reads, adding that an extension of emergency unemployment insurance should be tied to the gun lobby’s agenda: “Contact your Senators. Ask them to continue objecting to any Unanimous Consent request which would allow Obama's unemployment bill (S. 1845) to be passed, unless Senators are granted the right to vote on the anti-gun ObamaCare mandate.”

As we have noted earlier, the Affordable Care Act has a provision barring the creation of a possible gun owner database and prohibiting discrimination against gun owners, and the president’s executive actions similarly do not compel doctors to ask about gun ownership.

The gun lobby is now all but admitting that it uses conspiracy theories to encourage “fear buying” during election season.

3. ‘Disgusting Racist’ Obama ‘Despises’ White People

Former congressman Allen West is furious that the Obama administration is cautioning schools against using a “zero tolerance” disciplinary policy, a failing program that contributes to the school-to-prison pipeline. But according to West, this is all part of the Obama administration’s supposed “insanity” and anti-white racism.

“This is my clear and succinct message to white Americans. How long will it be before ‘you people’ realize you have elevated someone to the office of president who abjectly despises you — not to mention his henchman Holder,” West writes. “Combined they are the most vile and disgusting racists — not you.”

2. Anti-Gay Rhetoric Sweeps Russian Media

As the Religious Right’s love affair with Russia continues, it is no surprise to see Russian media using similar anti-gay rhetoric as US-based activists. The BBC reports today that Russia’s new laws targeting the gay community has “led to an upsurge in homophobia,” much of it encouraged by the pro-government media.

“Almost all [news reports on homosexuality] displayed an attitude that was either outright hostile or else noticeably negative towards homosexuals,” including claims linking homosexuality to child abuse and terrorism, or “gay jihad.” One prominent talk show host even warned that “Russia was in danger of being engulfed by a ‘homosexual sodomite tsunami’” while a Russian actor said he hopes to “shove all gays live into an oven.”

Russian President Vladimir Putin just today suggested that gay people are likely to prey on young people, telling gays and lesbians that they should visit Sochi for the Olympics but “just leave the kids alone, please.”

1. Demons Are In Your Pot

Religious Right activist Gordon Klingenschmitt recently launched his bid for the Colorado State House, and is already angry about the state’s legalization of marijuana following a successful 2012 voter referendum.

“There is a demonic spirit of drunkenness and it’s not just alcohol,” Klingenschmitt says, arguing that smoking pot “invites” demonic spirits into you. “Why do you think you have hallucinations? These spiritual visions that you have are not just biological; they’re actually demonic.”

Paranoia-Rama: Pot Welfare; Islamists In Charge & The Gay Police State Is Coming For You

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

This week, we learned more details about President Obama’s sinister gay-Sharia plot. And according to one right-wing radio host, if the president fails to implement his nefarious policies before his second term runs out, he will simply set up “a satellite administration in exile.”

5. Pot Wreaking Havoc On Colorado!

Colorado’s legalization of marijuana went into effect at the start of the year, providing plenty of material for satirical websites such as the Daily Currant and the National Report. Unfortunately, it seems that many people fell for the Daily Currant’s post titled “Marijuana Overdoses Kill 37 in Colorado On First Day of Legalization”; many also believed the National Report articles, “Feds Raid Colorado Pot Shop” and “Colorado Pot Shop Accepting Food Stamps – Taxpayer Funded Marijuana for Welfare Recipients.”

Of course, we don’t need satirical stories from the Daily Currant or National Report when we already have terrible reporting on marijuana policy from folks like Fox News commentator Bill O’Reilly and Washington Times opinion editor Emily Miller.

4. Priebus Uncovers Democratic Jobless Aid Conspiracy

After Senate Republicans failed to block a vote to extend unemployment benefits for three months, Republican National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus alleged that is actually the Democrats who want the jobless aid bill to fail, even though every single Democratic member of the Senate voted to consider the legislation. “They don’t want this to pass,” Priebus said, arguing that Democrats simply want to make Republicans look bad by trying to hold a vote on an extension of unemployment insurance for 1.3 million jobseekers.

“I’m reasonably certain this theory is stark raving mad, but let’s assume for the sake of conversation that Priebus is onto something,” Steve Benen responded. “If this were true, wouldn’t it make sense for Republican leaders to pass the measures and undermine the Democratic plan?”

Instead, all but six Senate Republicans opposed it.

3. The Mythical Gay Police State

The National Organization for Marriage is still fuming Duck Dynasty star Phil Robertson’s brief suspension from A&E and defending his imaginary constitutional right to appear on television. In a hysterical post about the Duck Dynasty flap — since deleted but grabbed by Jeremy Hooper — NOM president Brian Brown warned that soon the police may arrest and prosecute people for “criminal hate-speech charges.” He asserted that the “homosexual lobby” is creating “a new State regime” that will make religious beliefs “subject to punishment” and “grounds for criminal action.”

“This is what our country is facing if the same-sex ‘marriage’ movement gets its way: a society in which not just Phil and other celebrities who voice Christian values are put in the crosshairs and targeted for persecution, but any ordinary citizen who believes in traditional values — ordinary citizens like you and me — will be liable to sanction,” Brown wrote.

Laura Ingraham delivered a similar message on her radio show this week, cautioning that gay rights laws represent “a victory against religious liberty” that “puts us on a very dangerous path, it’s a path that Karl Marx would be very happy from the grave, or from hell, to see us being on right now.”

2. Limbaugh: Obama Will Keep Power After Second Term

When President Obama announced that his family may stay in the Washington, DC, area after his second term ends so his youngest daughter can graduate from school, Rush Limbaugh’s sixth sense for conspiracies was immediately triggered.

The conservative talk show host alleged that Obama will try to hold on to power by establishing “a satellite administration in exile” with the “media continuing to treat him as though he is still president.” He warned that Obama will have an “unprecedented post-presidency” that will allow him to hold onto the reins of power even outside of elected office. 

“He’s gonna be staying there to protect his legacy and to make sure it is never unwound,” Limbaugh said. “Unless he’s run out of town in shame.”

1. Islamists In The White House

Doing his best Joseph McCarthy impression, Fox News pundit Tom McInerney insists that he has a list of names of the members of the Muslim Brotherhood who are working in government…except he doesn’t know their names. “We’ve got Muslim Brotherhood in the U.S. government today,” McInerney told the Washington radio station WMAL. “I haven’t got their names exactly but there’s a list of them, at least 10 or 15 of them in the U.S. government.”

Bryan Fischer of the American Family Association took this theory one step further to contend that the chief Islamist in the Obama administration is Obama himself:

Paranoia-Rama: Obama's Alien Mission, Comic Book Communism & How Salsa Is Destroying America

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

Did you know that you can be thrown in jail simply for criticizing President Obama? Or that Obama will soon pretend to speak with aliens as part of a ploy to silence the criticism that he has apparently already criminalized? Learn more in this week’s edition of Paranoia-Rama:

5. Obama’s Alien-Canadian Plot

Since President Obama failed to nuke the U.S. and kill 90 percent of Americans, activist Jim Garrow claims that he is now preparing “the greatest deception that mankind has ever faced”: contact with alien life.

Apparently, attempting to nuke America didn’t help the president become more popular, so Garrow reasons that the president will now try to improve his polling numbers by pretending to be in “communication with people from other civilizations beyond Earth.” Garrow argues that if that doesn’t work, Obama will call in troops from Canada to start repressing and killing civilians… including Garrow himself.

4. Mexican Food Destroying America

The White Nationalists over at VDARE are outraged by the way the Associated Press reported on salsa becoming America’s No. 1 condiment. VDARE linked the stories of salsa overtaking ketchup to the War on Christmas, arguing that the media is trying to undercut America’s cultural identity with “Hispanic Cuisine Hype” and “the Demographic-Change-Is-Inevitable theme.”

Blogger Allan Wall asked, ruefully, if the “historic American nation” is about to be “radically transformed, beyond recognition, without our permission?”

3. Nelson Mandela Comic Book Is Dangerous Communist Brainwashing

Accuracy In Media’s Cliff Kincaid is upset about the release of a new comic book chronicling the life of Nelson Mandela, which Kincaid fears will indoctrinate kids into communism by not calling Mandela a communist.

“If used in schools and libraries, this comic book will deceive ‘students and reluctant readers’ about how communism has come to power in South Africa. What purpose is served by that?” Kincaid asks. “It will enable the same forces to make even more gains around the world, including in the United States, by operating as ‘progressives.’”

He is also upset that people refer to South Africa as a democratic state, as Kincaid believes it is a communist nation committing anti-white genocide.

2. It Is Now Illegal To Criticize Obama!

If it was a crime to criticize President Obama, then almost everyone we monitor here on RightWingWatch would probably be in jail right now. But televangelists Jim Bakker and Rick Joyner now seem to believe that the government has banned criticism of Obama.

“Usually I don’t mention the president anymore, it’s very frightening, because they can take and put you in prison now if you speak out against our leaders,” Bakker said. “I don’t know what happened to America, this is not the America I knew when I was a boy.” Joyner added: “I believe if we don’t speak out we’re all going to be in prison very, very soon.”

Of course, this is the exact same shtick that the far right used to gin up fear and anger during the debate over the 2009 Hate Crimes Prevention Act. Religious Right activists predicted that anti-gay activists and pastors would be thrown into jail as soon as the law was enacted. Of course, they were lying.

1. Benghazi Conspiracy Theory Gets Even More Desperate

As their conspiracy theory surrounding the 2012 Benghazi attack continues to unravel, now right-wing activists and Republicans claim the New York Times is part of a cover-up…of something.

After a Times investigation into the incident debunked the GOP’s messaging about the attack and the administration’s response, Republican congressmen including Mike Rogers, Trey Gowdy and Lynn Westmoreland are now saying that the Times editorial board must have concocted the report in order to help Hillary Clinton’s potential presidential campaign.

Of course, the congressmen have absolutely no evidence to back up any of their allegations, but it’s not like a lack of evidence got in the way of their increasingly desperate and partisan Benghazi witch hunt.

Paranoia-Rama: War On Christmas Hoax, Obama's Gay Revenge & The Plot To Nuke Charleston

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

Apparently, we here at Right Wing Watch are receiving secret information on the American public courtesy of the NSA. This week we learned top-secret details about the War on Christmas, along with the Obama administration’s false flag attacks and plan to nuke South Carolina. It’s all here in this week’s Paranoia-Rama:

5. Student Suspended For Saying ‘Merry Christmas’?

The National Report strikes again! An article from the satirical site about a San Francisco school suspending a nine-year-old student for wishing a “Merry Christmas” to an atheist teacher went viral this week, enraging War on Christmas belligerents. A real school with a similar name to the fictional school mnamed in the National Report’s spoof has been inundated with nasty calls and violent threats from angry people across the country who didn’t realize the article was a hoax.

Judging by the source, we wouldn’t be surprised if the story eventually gets a mention on Fox & Friends.

4. Indian Diplomat’s Arrest A Gay Plot

Bryan Fischer of the American Family Association believes that last week’s controversial arrest of an Indian diplomat in New York occurred not because of the diplomat’s alleged mistreatment of her housekeeper but as “payback” for an Indian supreme court decision recriminalizing homosexuality. “I think there is one simple reason: This is payback by President Obama because a week ago the supreme court in the country of India reinstated a law that bans homosexual sex, it criminalizes homosexual conduct,” Fischer said.

Legal disputes between the diplomat and her former maid have been going on for months and Secretary of State John Kerry expressed regret over the incident, but since Fischer is absolutely obsessed with gay issues it’s not like he needs any evidence to substantiate his case.

3. Obama Will Use NSA To Leak Information To Liberal Groups

Larry Klayman, the conservative attorney who successfully challenged the NSA’s domestic surveillance programs, seems convinced that President Obama will leak information collected by the NSA to progressive organizations, including us (even though our parent organization, People For the American Way, is part of a separate legal challenge to the NSA).

Klayman believes this is part of a plan “to destroy conservatives, libertarians, people of faith and anyone else who believes in true freedom” that will concentrate power in the hands of Obama’s “wildly ultra-leftist, atheist, anti-Judeo-Christian, anti-white and Muslim benefactors, supporters and friends.”

2. About That Guy Who Stopped Obama From Nuking Charleston…

As we’ve been reporting, conservative activist Jim Garrow is insistent that three military officials dealing with nuclear arms were fired because they stopped President Obama’s plan to nuke Charleston, South Carolina. Yesterday, the Washington Post ran a report on the actual reasons the one of the generals responsible for nuclear weapons was fired, including his excessive drinking and misbehavior.

Not that any of Garrow’s followers know or care, as we expect Garrow — who recently predicted the emergence of an anti-Obama “guerrilla war” — to continue to claim that the general was a great hero who saved America from a malicious Obama-Soros scheme.

1. Obama’s ‘False Flag’ Actress?

Leave it to Erik Rush to promote a bizarre blog post from a fringe right-wing website about how young women photographed crying at the scenes of the Aurora and Sandy Hook shootings and the Boston Marathon Bombing look similar, and therefore must be the same woman and an actress paid by President Obama.

The website, Moral Matters, says that the photos are proof that Obama is staging the violent events in order to distract from his “criminal scandals and his criminal ID fraud,” bolster gun control efforts and gut the Second Amendment. We wonder if Erik Rush will discuss this conspiracy theory the next time Fox News invites him on air.

Paranoia-Rama: This Week In Right-Wing Lunacy - 12/13/13

In this edition, we learn that homosexuality is as contagious as the common cold, public schools are pushing homosexual/Islamic indoctrination and that President Obama may be behind the death of a state official involved in the release of his birth certificate. And no, there is absolutely no evidence to actually support any of this.

Paranoia-Rama: This Week In Right-Wing Lunacy - 12/6/13

RWW's Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

Did you know that gay people seek to use the government to steal the children of conservative parents and kill Christians? Or that a commonsense, bipartisan bill to ban undetectable guns first signed into law by Ronald Reagan is actually a plot by President Obama to threaten all gun owners? Well, we didn’t! But thanks to the totally reasonable and coherent arguments from right-wing figures, we do now:

5. The Gay-Liberal Adoption Plot Exposed

Stan Solomon, who you might remember from such conspiracy theories as ‘Obama is forming a black paramilitary’ and ‘Obamacare will force people into electro-shock therapy,’ now warns that liberals will take the children of conservative parents and put them into the homes of abusive gay couples. Of course, Phyllis Schlafly thinks Solomon is onto something:

4. Limbaugh Senses Conspiracy Behind Retraction Of Erroneous Report

The World Health Organization corrected a report that mistakenly claimed there was a rise in “self-inflicted” HIV infections in Greece as a way to collect welfare benefits , saying the report was unfounded and a result of an editing error: “There is no evidence suggesting that deliberate self-infection with H.I.V. goes beyond a few anecdotal cases.” But it didn't matter to Rush Limbaugh, who insisted that, in fact, the original, erroneous WHO declaration was true:

So what do you think really happened here? Do you think they goofed up? I don’t, either. I think they’re trying to walk back what they inadvertently admitted yesterday. And being leftists, I’m sure they didn't think that they would get the kind of reaction they got. I’m sure they were expecting to get reactions rooted in sympathy and compassion, and instead they got reactions that were based and rooted in outrage. They were not prepared for that, so now it's, dare we say, CYA time here at the World Health Organization.

3. Obama Trying To Close Vatican Embassy

Even though the words “relocate” and “close” are different words that mean different things, Republicans pounced on the news that the US Embassy to the Holy See, or the Vatican, will be relocated to charge that Obama is trying to close the embassy as part of his anti-Catholic agenda.

Jeb Bush suggested it was the result of “retribution for Catholic organizations opposing Obamacare;” the National Republican Senatorial Committee called it “a slap in the face to Catholic-Americans;” one Washington Times columnist billed the move as an attempt to “snub the Pope” and “pick a fight with Catholics” and a Breitbart blogger said it was the result of “the Regime’s pro-abortion, pro-gay marriage stance.”

“Neither Obama, nor the State Department, are planning on permanently closing the U.S. Embassy to the Holy See – also known as the Vatican,” CNN reports. “What is happening, however, is the building the embassy is currently using is being moved to a property closer to Vatican City.”

The Washington Post points out that the government report “which urged moving the embassy for both cost and security reasons — as well as practicality” was issued during the Bush administration in 2008, or before Obama even took office.

2. Ban On Undetectable Guns Threatens All Gun Owners

Gun Owners of America is deeply concerned that the House of Representatives passed a bipartisan bill to “extend a ban on manufacturing plastic firearms that are not detectable by security-screening devices.” The right-wing group’s spokesman Erich Pratt claims that the bill will open “the door for greater mischief much later,” will inevitably be “twisted by President Obama,” and represents “an unconstitutional infringement of our liberties that is not only ineffective, but could eventually be expanded by an anti-gun administration to ban even more guns.”

The National Association for Gun Rights put out a similar petition demanding the House “oppose any and all gun control legislation” unless they too want to be labeled as “gun-grabbers” and “anti-gunners.” NAGR calls the bill “a ticking time bomb” that “could spell disaster for gun owners.”

How far out are GOA and NAGR for opposing a bill prohibiting the manufacture of undetectable plastic guns? Not only does the GOP leadership support an extension of the 1988 law (that’s right, signed into law by Ronald Reagan), but even the National Rifle Association refused to oppose the bill.

1. Gay Marriage Will Kill Christians

We probably shouldn’t be surprised that a commentator for Renew America believes that the gay rights movement is a Satanic plot to murder Christians.

“The Godless communists (or fascists, if you prefer) are using the homosexual agenda to work toward eradicating Christian opposition to their plans, which are Satan’s plans,” Gina Miller writes. “If you know your Bible, then you know that Christianity is destined to be outlawed. We are moving steadily toward a time when Christians here in America will be in danger of state-sanctioned murder for their beliefs.”

We really couldn’t make this stuff up if we tried:

Paranoia-Rama: This Week In Right-Wing Lunacy - 11/22/13

RWW's Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

Next time you turn on “The Walking Dead,” be warned that it may actually be part of a government plot to condition Americans to accept mass killings. That is, if Obama doesn’t get away with his plan to nuke America first!

Check out what we learned from some of the “brightest” minds of the far-right this week:

5. Next Stop: Military Coup

Even though the National Review once demanded the Senate change its rules on the filibustering of judicial nominees, one columnist for the conservative journal, Charles W. Cooke, told Fox News host Gretchen Carlson yesterday that Obama is setting the stage to undermine the democratic system of government: “You could just ignore the House. You could have a military coup; you could have anything at the end of this.” And all this time we thought conservatives would be delighted at the thought of a military coup.

4. Gay People Behind Homophobic Violence

Pastor Scott Lively helped come up with Russia’s new law that stifles free speech perceived to be “homosexual propaganda,” and he relies on some incredible logic when trying to explain how the country’s crackdown on the gay community and the increase in gay hate crimes has nothing to do with its anti-gay laws.

See, according to Lively, the Nazis were all gay. Therefore, neo-Nazis in Russia who are beating up gay people must be gay, too! Lively didn’t offer any evidence to back up his claims that Russia is only experiencing “gay-on-gay crime.” “The guys that are beating up gays in Russia,” Lively insisted, “are butch homosexuals.”

3. Immigration Reform A Muslim Brotherhood Plot

It turns out the allegation that Obama has secret plan to bring 50-100 million Muslim immigrants was shockingly not true. Apparently, Obama actually wants to open the borders to 150 million Muslims. The American Family Association’s Sandy Rios even thinks that the whole push for immigration reform is being engineered by the Muslim Brotherhood “to bring in tons of illegal immigrant Muslims who don’t wish us any kind of good.”

2. Government Using Zombie Culture To Prepare For Mass Executions

Are TV shows like “The Walking Dead” helping the government prepare “the public for mass executions of people”? Conservative talk show host Rick Wiles is just asking the question! During an interview with a spokesman for the Zombie Response Team, Wiles wondered if the popularity of zombie culture is really just a big government plot to make people more comfortable for impending killings. “I’m trying to figure out: What are they up to? What are they preparing for?”

1. Obama Almost Nuked America

And he would have gotten away with it, too, if it wasn’t for three meddling admirals. According to right-wing activists Erik Rush and Jim Garrow, Obama planned to kill 300 million people by setting off nuclear bombs across the US in order to help George Soros make more money.

While Obama’s dastardly plan was stopped in the nick of time by “three absolute heroes,” Garrow believes Obama will blackmail his way into an unconstitutional third term and maybe then he will nuke America for real.

Paranoia-Rama: This Week In Right-Wing Lunacy - 11/15/13

RWW's Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

President Obama is up to it again, this time trying to make everyone gay (just like him) and establish a secret army of soldiers posing as doctors...and there is nothing you can do about it because Obama is rigging all the elections. At least, that’s what we have learned this week from the right-wing media. 

5. Military Attacking Christians

Religious Right activists have continued to make dubious and discredited claims about supposed religious persecution in the military as part of an effort to prove that conservative Christians are the real victims of societal discrimination. While appearing on Fox News, Tony Perkins of the Family Research Council warned the Obama administration is “on a search-and-destroy mission as it pertains to religious liberty.”

“The military has been homosexualized,” Liberty Counsel’s Matt Barber said. “The homosexual agenda has taken over the United States military.” Frank Gaffney alleged that policies ending discrimination against gay and female service members have made Christianity “a career-threatening activity” and as a result “invite war” on America.

4. Gohmert Exposes Obamacare’s Secret Strike Force

The Affordable Care Act included a provision to expand the U.S. Public Health Service Commissioned Corps, which focuses on emergency responses, to include part-time members who would join the affiliated Ready Reserve Corps. But Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-TX), who is becoming a regular fixture on Paranoia-Rama, thinks this actually may be a sinister plot by Obama to train doctors with weapons as part of a plan to suppress the American people. This isn’t the first time Gohmert made such an accusation, and even though Gohmert’s claim is completely erroneous, he will probably defend his remarks by insisting that he is just asking the question!

3. The UN Is Coming For Your Kids

“They're coming for your daughters and sons... WHO WANTS OUR DAUGHTERS? WHY DO THEY WANT OUR DAUGHTERS?” That’s how an actual email from Austin Ruse, the head of the Catholic Family & Human Rights Institute, begins. “The sexual radicals have your children, MY CHILDREN, in their crosshairs.” According to Ruse, a United Nations Population Fund report on ways to address adolescent pregnancy is proof that the UN wants to train kids how to masturbate and get abortions. Seriously.

2. ENDA Will Force People To Be Gay

After the Employment Non-Discrimination Act passed the US Senate with bipartisan support, Robert Knight took to the Washington Times to argue that ENDA would “repeal the Bible.” Not to be outdone, Liberty Counsel’s Mat Staver said that ENDA and similar gay rights laws put America on “the road toward a revolution” in order to resist the supposed anti-Christian persecution. But Michael Peroutka really knew about the gay rights end game, predicting that ENDA would ultimately “force” people to be gay.

1. Cuccinelli Won Virginia After All!

The co-founder and managing director of LifeSiteNews, one of Ken Cuccinelli’s favorite websites, claims that Cuccinelli actually won the Virginia gubernatorial election because he won more geographic territory. Steve Jalsevac writes:

Notice that the map seems to be almost solid red. And yet, Ken Cuccinelli somehow very narrowly lost to his Democrat opponent. To me, something smells about this race (not just because of all the red on the map) and I suspect Ken Cuccinelli actually won Virginia, but certain things happened, beyond the betrayal by some Republicans, campaign weaknesses and other reported issues, to ensure that that would not be the official result.



My overwhelming hunch is that the McAuliffe campaign, with the help of traitorous social liberal Republicans, engineered the voting to make sure that Ken Cuccinelli could not win the election no matter how many people voted for him.

Of course, the obvious answer is that Terry McAuliffe dominated more urban areas and that geographic space does not equal population. But Jalsevac, citing zero evidence, thinks the returns are “suspect.” He adds that Cuccinelli’s extreme social agenda made him more likely to win the election against McAuliffe than a more moderate Republican candidate, which he thinks is just another reason Cuccinelli probably won the election.

Now, you may ask, didn’t the party breakdown of the results in Virginia’s counties in the 2013 gubernatorial election look very similar to those in the 2012 presidential election?

Well, Jalsevac has an answer for that too, linking to a 2012 article which says the Democrats rigged the 2012 election too.

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Paranoia-Rama Posts Archive

Brian Tashman, Friday 04/11/2014, 12:10pm
RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right. Did you know that it is illegal to be a Christian in America? Or that World War II was all about promoting homosexuality? Probably not, but you might just think that if you get all of your news from the paranoid world of the Religious Right media. 5. Hitler’s Gay Dream Religious Right talk show host Rick Wiles is not happy about the growing support for gay rights in America, which he believes is really the fulfillment of Adolf Hitler’s dream to engender a “race... MORE
Brian Tashman, Friday 04/04/2014, 12:45pm
RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right. Every time we think we are tired and bored from hearing the constant complaints from far-right pundits about how President Obama is a communist tyrant, they always seem to find new ways to entertain us. Maybe they will eventually move on to more pressing issues, like Satan’s use of graham crackers to advance homosexuality. 5. Satanic Graham Crackers Joining other anti-gay activists calling for a boycott of Honey Maid graham crackers because of a TV ad featuring a gay couple... MORE
Brian Tashman, Friday 03/28/2014, 12:20pm
RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right. After turning the children of America gay, it turns out that Disney’s hit film Frozen is also tricking kids into embracing witchcraft. Of course, that is just one of several anti-gay conspiracy theories we uncovered this week. 5. Gays Part Of New World Order/Freemason/Marxist Conspiracy Religious Right pastor Scott Lively, who has played a role in influencing anti-gay laws in countries such as Uganda and Russia, explained in a recent interview that he believes the gay... MORE
Brian Tashman, Friday 03/21/2014, 3:55pm
RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right. Before the Internet becomes censored by our Chinese-Islamist overlords, right-wing figures would like you to know that America is being destroyed by feminism, gay rights and President Obama (who may or may not be the Antichrist). Not that any of that matters anyway, because it is all really a distraction from Benghazi. 5. Gay Rights Lead To Economic Collapse Family Research Council president Tony Perkins has been dismayed by growing calls within the GOP to “agree to... MORE
Brian Tashman, Friday 03/14/2014, 1:55pm
RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right. There are a lot of problems in America today, and as we all know they are a result of Disney’s “pro-homosexual” agenda, Common Core and ancient Egyptian curses. 5. America Was Cursed By Ancient Egyptians Did you know that ancient, Baal-worshiping Egyptians came to North America long ago and put the continent under a demonic curse? Well you do now! Just let pastor John Benefiel, who helped Gov. Rick Perry organize his The Response prayer rally, explain: 4. Gay... MORE
Brian Tashman, Friday 03/07/2014, 3:20pm
RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right. This week, here at Right Wing Watch we have been monitoring the Conservative Political Action Conference, the American Conservative Union’s annual summit that has been packed with typical right-wing blustering over taxes, Benghazi, Ronald Reagan, not to mention plenty of good old fashioned anti-government conspiracy theories: 5) Wayne LaPierre’s American Nightmare NRA head Wayne LaPierre told CPAC attendees yesterday that “political and media elites... MORE
Brian Tashman, Friday 02/28/2014, 1:25pm
RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right. Apparently, Satan is going to install the next president, use gay people to destroy the black community and take over the world to bring about the Last Days. But at least we can enjoy “penis cakes” before the world comes to an end. 5) Obamacare Race War Just as Ted Nugent isn’t actually sorry for calling President Obama a “subhuman mongrel,” the National Rifle Association board member and Republican surrogate also isn’t backing down from his... MORE