Right Wing Bonus Tracks: Trump Made Your Internet Faster

  • Rabidly anti-LGBTQ activist Scott Lively failed in his bid to win the Republican gubernatorial nomination in Massachusetts yesterday, but he did still manage to rack up nearly 100,000 votes.
  • Rick Eldridge, the producer of the upcoming “Trump Prophecy” movie, hopes that his film will heal the nation: “We have such a divided nation right now, so I hope this film can in some way be maybe a point toward healing.”
  • Right-wing television host Gordon Klingenschmitt claims that since the Trump administration reversed Net Neutrality, “everyone’s internet speed has gone up 21 percent.”
  • Right-wing pastor Jim Garlow will be stepping down from his position at Skyline Church at the end of the year so that he can focus more on “governmental ministry.”
  • Religious Right activist Bradlee Dean was not impressed with the funeral services for the late Sen. John McCain: “John McCain a war hero? According to what they are reporting then I guess Benedict Arnold was a hero as well.”
  • Finally, Right-wing pastor Mike Evans explains why the Religious Right will never abandon Trump: “Why do we support Donald Trump? Because America was on the Sodom road. We all saw the handwriting of God’s judgement coming like a freight train on America, but God chose the most unlikely person to make America great again, Donald Trump. What a shock to have a president tell us the truth and refuse to play the political game. Yes, Donald Trump, like all of us, is a sinner but we have no doubt that he has come to the Savior. And when Donald Trump says ‘Merry Christmas,’ it is because of his personal faith.”