Paranoia-Rama: Conservatives Getting Persecuted, Schools Peer Pressuring Kids To Be Gay, Obama Taking Guns

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

Apparently, the most oppressed class in America today is conservative politicians, whom people are horribly persecuting by failing to promote their books or demand they run for president. It is even worse for the everyday right-wing activists, who seem to be living under constant threats of lynching.

5. William Gheen: Immigrants Out To Lynch Us

William Gheen, the head of the Nativist group Americans for Legal Immigration PAC, said on a Tea Party radio show this week that immigrants are just as grave a threat to the country as Al Qaeda, warning that the things they “are going to do to America are much more powerful and lasting impacts than anything that Al Qaeda could blow up, short of a nuclear detonation.”

“Once they get enough people in here to get the boat really sinking, and then they get the borders destroyed and they start taking up all the guns and we’ve got wave after wave of future illegal immigrants pouring in and pouring in, the existing stock of Americans are going to be so politically and economically buried under this wave, that it’s a weapon from which we can never recover,” he continued.

Just who is most at risk of the immigrant menace? Why, conservatives of course! Gheen explained on another right-wing radio show that anti-immigrant activists risk getting stabbed and lynched by “groups of minorities” if they are brave enough to attend a protest or demonstration.

We are still waiting to read news reports about the violence supposedly targeting the anti-immigrant rallies that took place last week.

4. Gay Peer Pressure In Public Schools

James David Manning has returned to warn parents that their “children are under a massive attack by the homosexual lobby, especially within the public school system.”

The virulently anti-gay Harlem pastor said in a video message yesterday that gay people will “peer pressure” students “to become homosexual” by warping their “tender” minds.

Manning advises that instead of enrolling their children in public schools that “glorify homosexuality,” parents should send their kids to his church’s affiliated school, which, he says, is “the best school in America right now.”

3. Google Discriminating Against Dinesh D’Souza!

First Dinesh D’Souza claimed he was the victim of political persecution from the Justice Department. Then Costco. Then the New York Times. And now, D’Souza claims he is the victim of political persecution from Google, alleging that the company’s search engine is deliberately hiding screening times of his new anti-Obama film because its top executives are Obama supporters.

D’Souza has been busily making rounds on Fox News and conservative talk radio shows to share his tale of persecution, insisting the whole time that he doesn’t “want to seem like a crybaby.”

His media blitz caught the attention of GOP Rep. Dana Rohrabacher, who is now calling for an investigation into Google’s censorship of searches for the word “America,” which obviously should lead directly to the page for D’Souza’s film: “This doesn’t deserve to be ignored. We need to verify the statistics in some way, and I will be suggesting the appropriate committee or subcommittee have some kind of hearing on this. We know there were significant incidences, and that would suggest there was intent behind Google’s nonperformance.”

Of course the claim is completely baseless, but that has never stopped House Republicans from picking up discredited right-wing conspiracy theories that are championed by the likes of Fox News and right-wing talk radio.

2. Media Discriminating Against Michele Bachmann!

Hey, why hasn’t anyone asked outgoing congresswoman Michele Bachmann if she is running for president? Her last bid went so well — I mean, she did come in sixth place in the Iowa caucus after all, fielding just over 6,000 votes — so she is clearly justified in thinking that the media is snubbing her when they leave her off lists of possible 2016 Republican presidential candidates:

“The only thing that the media has speculated on is that it’s going to be various men that are running,” she replied. “They haven’t speculated, for instance, that I’m going to run. What if I decide to run? And there’s a chance I could run.”

The four-term congresswoman that she would “certainly” reap the benefits of having run once before, if she were to launch a second White House bid.

“Like with anything else, practice makes perfect,” she said. “And I think if a person has gone through the process — for instance, I had gone through 15 presidential debates — it’s easy to see a person’s improvement going through that.”

Clearly, there must be some reason that the media isn’t treating her as a serious contender…

1. Obama Coming For Your Guns To Turn On The Population

Rafael Cruz has not only caught wind of the communist game plan to take people’s guns and kill millions of people, he knows that President Obama is very close to implementing it.

Arguing that Obama has a “totalitarian” worldview, Sen. Ted Cruz’s father and advisor alleged that Obama is bent on following Joseph Stalin and Mao Zedong in confiscating firearms from the citizenry and turning them against the people.