Paranoia-Rama: Obama’s Homo Demons, President Satan & Arizona Penis Cakes

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

Apparently, Satan is going to install the next president, use gay people to destroy the black community and take over the world to bring about the Last Days. But at least we can enjoy “penis cakes” before the world comes to an end.

5) Obamacare Race War

Just as Ted Nugent isn’t actually sorry for calling President Obama a “subhuman mongrel,” the National Rifle Association board member and Republican surrogate also isn’t backing down from his statements likening President Obama to the Nazis.

When conservative talk show host Dennis Miller told Nugent he didn’t buy his Nazi comparison, Nugent insisted that the president is using the IRS and the health care reform law to spark a race war “like the brownshirts.” Media Matters grabbed the clip:

4) Satan Will Put A Witch In The White House

The Trinity Broadcasting Network considers Kim Clement a prophet, and so should you! The TBN host recently prophesied that Satan will “put a witch in the White House” who will advance the demonic spirit of “Jezebel,” and can only be stopped by a socialism-slaying politician.

3) Penis Cakes On The Way

Tea Party Nation head Judson Phillips is aggrieved that Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer vetoed her state’s ‘right-to-discriminate’ bill, a decision which he believes will lead to “tyranny,” “fascism” and “slavery.” In fact, he believes that bakers will now be forced to bake penis cakes:

Should a devote baker be required to create a cake for a homosexual wedding that has a giant phallic symbol on it or should a baker be required to create pastries for a homosexual wedding in the shape of genitallia [sic]? Or should a photographer be required to photograph a homosexual wedding where the participants decide they want to be nude or engage in sexual behavior?

We’re not sure what sort of weddings Phillips is used to attending, but we wish we had been invited.

2) The World Has Gone Gay

Scott Lively has been on a roll lately after launching a new anti-gay group, insisting that his fight against gay rights is literally a life-or-death battle against Satan. During an interview with Janet Mefferd where he explained why he believes LGBT equality is triggering the coming of the End Times, Lively said that there should be a “revolution” to defeat the socialist “conspiracy” aimed at “homosexualizing the whole world.”

1) Beware Obama’s ‘Homo Demons’

Far-far-right pastor James David Manning is at it again, this time hailing anti-gay leaders in Uganda, Gambia and Nigeria for resisting “this son of Satan Barack Hussein Obama” and his “anti-integrity, anti-life, anti-humanity, anti-universal understanding, anti-DNA” gay rights agenda.

Manning said that the decisions of Jason Collins and Michael Sam to come out of the closet are proof that “Obama has released these demons particularly upon the black males, this homosexual demon, hoping to influence as many black males to subscribe to ideas that are [as] homosexual, perverted, LGBT as possible.”

“Obama has released the homo demons on the black man; look out black woman, a white homo may take your man.” He said that under Obama’s direction, black men “are being scooped up by white homos,” thus destroying the black family.

The white homo is now moving into the black neighborhoods, looking for black men that have been converted into homosexuality. Black woman let me say something to you: You will have a very hard time competing against a white homosexual male, he’s usually got money, a white homo usually has an American Express card, he usually has an opportunity at the theatre, homos love the theatre, they love to go out to dinner parties, they love that kind of a thing. As a black woman you can’t compete not only with the financial strength of a white homo, black sister, this is devastating, black people need to rise up en masse and recognize the utter destruction that Obama is going in to destroy the black family with his homosexual statements and release of demons that he has done.